Reflective Letter:
Dear Mrs. German,
I have changed a lot this year and I have learned a lot. This year has taught me my strengths and my weaknesses. Even though I have changed, I have learned. Of course I have learned more in school and I have progressed in classes and in my writing. On the other hand, I have also learned more about myself. For example, I have learned not to care so much about what other people think. I used to care so much and I would never leave room for me to be myself. I always accepted other people for who they were, but I would still care too much to fully be myself. This year, I realized that the only way for anyone to ever truly accept you is for you to be yourself. I also gained learning from last year on acceptance. I learned that life isn't about always having everything your way. Sometimes life throws a curve ball at you and you have to accept it. Even if it is the hardest thing you have ever been through, you still have to learn to take a pause in life and breathe. Throughout this year, I have learned to accept things I would have never been able to accept before. These exceptions have changed my life forever and have broken apart my pathway to what I thought to be a great life. I have learned to pick up the pieces and I am still trying to put some back together. I have learned to accept that and I have learned to understand that my pathway is going to get broken quiet often; all I can do to fix it, is keep trying to put the pieces back together.
I'm not going to lie, this year had its ups, but it also defiantly had it's downs. The first semester was the craziest and busiest! It started out busy with my sister having field hockey. She made the varsity team and was a starter as a freshman which is absolutely incredible. While her season was going on, I decided to try out for soccer even though I do not like soccer at all. Devyn wanted me to try out so I surprised her the first day and I some how managed to make the team. I do not know how that worked out, but it did. School just started and luckily I had already met pretty much all of my teachers before hand. As soon as I start to get into the flow of things again, life drops a bomb. On Sunday, September 30, we got the worst call ever. My dad called my mom saying that my granddaddy wasn't breathing and that we needed to call 911 because he didn't know that address and my granny was hysterical. After we finally figured out the address, we called 911. We all rushed over to their newly bought condo to find three ambulances out front. By that time I was already devastated. My granddaddy and I were so close; he was not only my best friend, he was my hero. We got up to the room and they told us he just feel asleep, but I knew he was gone. He passed away on my side of the bed in me and Mariah's room. I went in there and saw him and felt my heart fall to the floor as I began to comprehend that he was gone. I miss him so much and I will never forget the unconditional love he gave everyone. He wasn't my biological grandfather, but we were closer than any grandparent I have ever had. Later that day we got a call from my Aunt in California who was completely unaware of what was going on here. She called to tell us she had her baby. The same day the best person in my life died and new cousin was born. Is it even possible to grieve and celebrate at the same time? This was truly the hardest day of my life! I felt bad because I felt like I should have been conflicted as to whether or not to celebrate or grieve. To me this was a no brainer, I was grieving, he was my granddaddy you can't expect me to put on a smile for a new baby I had never met before. That's what everyone expected me to do though especially because I have always been the person in the family with a smile on my face. I put on a fake smile for as long as I could which only lasted about 2 minutes, not even. They say that when a person dies, their spirit is instilled into a newborn. Everyone that night kept saying that and smiling like this new cousin of mine is going to be the best baby there is. I just kept wanted to scream and admit to them that its not going to be good because that means that this baby is going to remind me, every time I see her, that my hero is gone. I didn't want to be reminded of that and I still don't. This was my fist encounter of acceptance this school year. Realizing that my hero was gone forever made me question my entire life. I didn't know where I was going anymore. I didn't know if I even wanted a family when I was older because they wouldn't be able to know my granddaddy like I did. It hit me so hard that I gave up my dream of becoming a veterinarian. He was the person that instilled that dream in me when I was about 3 or 4. He put the idea in my head and told me that I could do it, so that's what I strived for. Now that he's gone, I gave up that dream because I couldn't do it without him. Anyways, the memorial service was, of course rough, but it was different. It was defiantly how he would have wanted it. We had a very nice, not too formal, service at our small church. It fits about 200 people; the entire place was packed. We had people in the back room watching the service on a television and people standing almost on top of each other in the main room. Everyone loved my granddaddy! I played You Are My Sunshine and Amazing Grace on the piano in honor of him. My friends came to support me without me even asking. That's when I realized who my true friends were. Devyn, Casey, and Elly were there and helped me through everything. After the service we went over to my granddaddy's favorite restaurant, Margie and Ray's. That's where I said my speech for him. That was my first encounter of acceptance for the year and it was a big, life changing encounter.
My next encounter of acceptance was not nearly as major, but it was big for me. I went to the Justin Bieber concert on January 19. "My World" was changed forever because I got to see my idol in person for the first time in my life. The concert was amazing, Justin was amazing, and the whole night was unforgettable. The point of acceptance for me, though, was when I was not chosen for his "One Less Lonely Girl". I didn't think I was going to get chosen, but the girl they chose was not enthusiastic at all. I learned to accept the fact that I was not his "One Less Lonely Girl" that night, but maybe another time I will be so fortunate and I will be able to meet him! The only thing I can do is "Pray" and "Believe" that I can be Justin's "One Less Lonely Girl" just "One Time". Then I will know that I was "Born to be Somebody" because in that moment, I will be Justin's "Favorite Girl" which means that I won't need "Somebody to Love" because I will have Justin. Then "I Would" be his "Baby" and we would go nowhere but "Up"!
These are all examples of my learning of acceptance throughout the year. I have learned how to accept anything life decides to throw at me! I have also changed as a writer. As you can see above, I have learned to incorporate quotes (or song titles) within sentences! :) I have also, learned a lot through my writing. I have learned how to express myself more and how to add emotion. I have learned a lot in poetry and how to make a poem flow better. In total I have learned a lot throughout this year about myself as a writer and myself in general! It has been a fantastic year and I cannot wait for high school! I am going to miss everyone so much, but I will defiantly come back and visit! :)
Sincerely,
Skyler Lowman! <3
PS: They were song titles in the Justin Bieber paragraph and "My World" is the name of his first album! :)
I have changed a lot this year and I have learned a lot. This year has taught me my strengths and my weaknesses. Even though I have changed, I have learned. Of course I have learned more in school and I have progressed in classes and in my writing. On the other hand, I have also learned more about myself. For example, I have learned not to care so much about what other people think. I used to care so much and I would never leave room for me to be myself. I always accepted other people for who they were, but I would still care too much to fully be myself. This year, I realized that the only way for anyone to ever truly accept you is for you to be yourself. I also gained learning from last year on acceptance. I learned that life isn't about always having everything your way. Sometimes life throws a curve ball at you and you have to accept it. Even if it is the hardest thing you have ever been through, you still have to learn to take a pause in life and breathe. Throughout this year, I have learned to accept things I would have never been able to accept before. These exceptions have changed my life forever and have broken apart my pathway to what I thought to be a great life. I have learned to pick up the pieces and I am still trying to put some back together. I have learned to accept that and I have learned to understand that my pathway is going to get broken quiet often; all I can do to fix it, is keep trying to put the pieces back together.
I'm not going to lie, this year had its ups, but it also defiantly had it's downs. The first semester was the craziest and busiest! It started out busy with my sister having field hockey. She made the varsity team and was a starter as a freshman which is absolutely incredible. While her season was going on, I decided to try out for soccer even though I do not like soccer at all. Devyn wanted me to try out so I surprised her the first day and I some how managed to make the team. I do not know how that worked out, but it did. School just started and luckily I had already met pretty much all of my teachers before hand. As soon as I start to get into the flow of things again, life drops a bomb. On Sunday, September 30, we got the worst call ever. My dad called my mom saying that my granddaddy wasn't breathing and that we needed to call 911 because he didn't know that address and my granny was hysterical. After we finally figured out the address, we called 911. We all rushed over to their newly bought condo to find three ambulances out front. By that time I was already devastated. My granddaddy and I were so close; he was not only my best friend, he was my hero. We got up to the room and they told us he just feel asleep, but I knew he was gone. He passed away on my side of the bed in me and Mariah's room. I went in there and saw him and felt my heart fall to the floor as I began to comprehend that he was gone. I miss him so much and I will never forget the unconditional love he gave everyone. He wasn't my biological grandfather, but we were closer than any grandparent I have ever had. Later that day we got a call from my Aunt in California who was completely unaware of what was going on here. She called to tell us she had her baby. The same day the best person in my life died and new cousin was born. Is it even possible to grieve and celebrate at the same time? This was truly the hardest day of my life! I felt bad because I felt like I should have been conflicted as to whether or not to celebrate or grieve. To me this was a no brainer, I was grieving, he was my granddaddy you can't expect me to put on a smile for a new baby I had never met before. That's what everyone expected me to do though especially because I have always been the person in the family with a smile on my face. I put on a fake smile for as long as I could which only lasted about 2 minutes, not even. They say that when a person dies, their spirit is instilled into a newborn. Everyone that night kept saying that and smiling like this new cousin of mine is going to be the best baby there is. I just kept wanted to scream and admit to them that its not going to be good because that means that this baby is going to remind me, every time I see her, that my hero is gone. I didn't want to be reminded of that and I still don't. This was my fist encounter of acceptance this school year. Realizing that my hero was gone forever made me question my entire life. I didn't know where I was going anymore. I didn't know if I even wanted a family when I was older because they wouldn't be able to know my granddaddy like I did. It hit me so hard that I gave up my dream of becoming a veterinarian. He was the person that instilled that dream in me when I was about 3 or 4. He put the idea in my head and told me that I could do it, so that's what I strived for. Now that he's gone, I gave up that dream because I couldn't do it without him. Anyways, the memorial service was, of course rough, but it was different. It was defiantly how he would have wanted it. We had a very nice, not too formal, service at our small church. It fits about 200 people; the entire place was packed. We had people in the back room watching the service on a television and people standing almost on top of each other in the main room. Everyone loved my granddaddy! I played You Are My Sunshine and Amazing Grace on the piano in honor of him. My friends came to support me without me even asking. That's when I realized who my true friends were. Devyn, Casey, and Elly were there and helped me through everything. After the service we went over to my granddaddy's favorite restaurant, Margie and Ray's. That's where I said my speech for him. That was my first encounter of acceptance for the year and it was a big, life changing encounter.
My next encounter of acceptance was not nearly as major, but it was big for me. I went to the Justin Bieber concert on January 19. "My World" was changed forever because I got to see my idol in person for the first time in my life. The concert was amazing, Justin was amazing, and the whole night was unforgettable. The point of acceptance for me, though, was when I was not chosen for his "One Less Lonely Girl". I didn't think I was going to get chosen, but the girl they chose was not enthusiastic at all. I learned to accept the fact that I was not his "One Less Lonely Girl" that night, but maybe another time I will be so fortunate and I will be able to meet him! The only thing I can do is "Pray" and "Believe" that I can be Justin's "One Less Lonely Girl" just "One Time". Then I will know that I was "Born to be Somebody" because in that moment, I will be Justin's "Favorite Girl" which means that I won't need "Somebody to Love" because I will have Justin. Then "I Would" be his "Baby" and we would go nowhere but "Up"!
These are all examples of my learning of acceptance throughout the year. I have learned how to accept anything life decides to throw at me! I have also changed as a writer. As you can see above, I have learned to incorporate quotes (or song titles) within sentences! :) I have also, learned a lot through my writing. I have learned how to express myself more and how to add emotion. I have learned a lot in poetry and how to make a poem flow better. In total I have learned a lot throughout this year about myself as a writer and myself in general! It has been a fantastic year and I cannot wait for high school! I am going to miss everyone so much, but I will defiantly come back and visit! :)
Sincerely,
Skyler Lowman! <3
PS: They were song titles in the Justin Bieber paragraph and "My World" is the name of his first album! :)
my_granddaddy.docx | |
File Size: | 12 kb |
File Type: | docx |
Above is the speech I said at my granddaddy's memorial service.